Who will replace Tucker Carlson?

Rupert Murdoch's short list

Who can possibly replace Tucker Carlson? Who?

1. Kari Lake. She’s tanned, rested, ready and delusional

2. Vladimir Putin

3. A soft silicone dildo with a bow tie

4. Pinocchio marionette with Hitler’s DNA

5. Maria Bartaromo: She’s a proven anchor and a proven liar

6. A John Deere heavy-duty manure spreader with a heavy-duty paddle beater assembly

7. Tasmanian Devil

8. Trump

9. The Joker

10. The Penguin

11. A sock puppet

12. Sidney Powell

13. Ted Nugent with his finger in an electrical socket

14. A puppy with a perpetually perplexed expression that’s “studio trained”

15. Sarah Palin

16. A pail of nails

17. Rudy Giuliani. Because he already has a sponsor: Four Seasons Landscaping

18. Steve Bannon and Herschel Walker in a hot tub

19. A Rush Lim-bot

20. Alex Jones hanging upside down over a shark tank