Poor "Snow White"
If at first you don't succeed...
Recently our beloved fairy tale dame was poisoned by press so bad even the princes of Publicity, Promotion and Profit at the Disney Corporation could not revive her.
Lesson learned, Disney Studios is reviewing other possible reboots of the “Snow White” franchise for the future.
Here are the Top Ten:
“Snowbody”: A tense thriller with Bob Odenkirk, in drag, as a retired female CIA agent whose secret woodland identity is revealed by a Russian lynx to a Wicked Witch named “Natasha”.
“Lily White”: Tilda Swinton stars as “the whitest of them all”.
“Snow White and the Seven Programmers”: Seven height-challenged individuals living in a silicon valley compound attempt to delete a famous cartoon icon from the planet’s collective memory.
“Snow Mercy”: Charlize Theron, as Snow White, discovers her own path with compassion and strength by blowing the wicked witch away with the help of an army of Special-Ops Nano-Dwarves.
“Snow Flake and the Seven Shareholders”: A corporate board caves to MAGA.
“Scared White”: A producer of a million dollar Hollywood property crosses the country to give a poisoned apple to a 20-year old Latina starlet for dragging her politics into his movie. The seven Dwarves do battle with the Ten Trolls.
“The Little Mermaid 2”: A mermaid as white as a salmon’s belly grows legs and rise through the ranks to
“Fifty Shades of White”: A tryst among the trees turns dark when the dwarves “Horny” and “Kinky” arrive.
“Revenge of the Witch: Snow White Episode VI”: An “enchanted” space maiden is revived by Prince Jar Jar with help from the seven Ewoks of Endor.
“Snow White and the Seven Reboots”: Epic story of one studio’s seven failed attempts to make a profitable blockbuster, each starring Rob Schneider.
Sometimes things are better left alone. “Making Great” again doesn’t always work. The good old days - were they really? I prefer the here and now and working to make life sane again!
good one!